The Hess Report

Thursday, September 11, 2003

More random things from the last few weeks...
Lucy has finally discovered the glory of the whole Disney princess thing. She's into Snow White. We watched it at movie night last week (lights going down on a dimmer switch, movie tickets, popcorn/candy/soda, the whole movie straight through, Dolby digital 5.1 on new big TV).

She likes Snow White and the dwarfs. But she loooves the peddler woman. That's the old hag into whom the wicked queen magically transforms. Lucy runs around quoting her, with a maniacal look on her face. "You little fools! I'll crush yer bones!" she'll shout. Occasionally, she'll let slide a sinister hiss: "The dwarfs will think she's dead!"

We've also trained her to say "My preciousssssss...." and wring her hands nastily.

Best first week of school
Maddie won the best first week of school story amongst those we know. Teachers love her, work level insultingly below her capabilities, making friends, bus driver yells a lot, etc., what-else-is-new?

When I picked her up on her second day of kindergarten, she handed me plastic bag.

"These are my pants," she said. Fifteen scenarios run through my mind, all of them bad. "One of the boys ['boys' was said in a kind of them vs. us manner, already] barfed, and I slipped in it."

"Oh. Only on your pants?" I said, finding that hard to believe.

"A little on my shoes, too." We're in the car by then, and I can't smell it, so it must not have been too bad.

I asked her if it was gross. According to her, all the girls and most of the boys were grossed out, but she didn't mind.

She's goes on to tell me how the nurse has extra clothes for stuff like this and how she's really nice. She also tells me about the other kids in the nurses office. The boy with the bloody nose that won't stop flowing. The ten year old girl who hurt her hand in the door, and was trying not to cry, but all they could do was change the ice pack every now and then and wait for her mom. All of which means that Maddie chatted their ears off the entire time she was in there.

"Hi, I'm Maddie. I'm five and three quarters. I slipped in barf, but it didn't gross me out. What's your name? Why won't your nose stop bleeding? Do you want to see a picture I drew of me falling in barf?"

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