The Hess Report


Thursday, September 08, 2005

A Good Excuse 

When the girls get out of their beds at night, they usually have a plausible excuse:

- I'm thirsty.
- I'm hungry.
- I'm scared.
- I'm worried about going to the doctor tomorrow.

Or, less plausibly but still getting a marginally passing grade for effort:

- I can't find "insert-stuffed-animal-name-here".
- I had a bad dream (when they had obviously not yet gone to sleep).
- Dingoes ate my baby! Okay, if they actually said that, and with an Australian accent, I'd let them stay up an extra half hour and eat ice cream the whole time.
- I can't sleep.

Lucy had already been put to bed tonight, and we were having a typical drama-filled (read "tears") discussion about life with Maddie. After several minutes, Lucy appeared in the kitchen. She had a big grin on her face. I gave her the look that said "And what is it tonight?"

She obviously hadn't prepared anything and had to wing it.

"Guys," she said, heaving a big sigh, "was Pearl a jellyfish or an octopus?"

Pearl is the baby squidapus character from Finding Nemo, which hasn't even been mentioned around our house for weeks. Where'd she pull that one out of? Her penchant for bathroom humor suggests a location. Her decision to forego even even the slightest shade of a decent pretense took me aback with its sheer audacity.

I kind of laughed. "Pearl's a squid," I said.

"A squid!" She hadn't thought of that.

"Go to bed."

She trotted off happily, apparently satisfied.

When I poked my head into their bedroom later to tell Maddie good night, I expected Lucy to be long asleep. Instead, she sat right up in her bed and said "You can go out now. I'm ready to sleep."

It's a good thing for her that she's unreasonably cute.

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